Wednesday, February 20, 2013

A Very Merry Feriversary

It really is interesting living where the seeds of my religion were first planted.  I can feel it in the woods outside my house, the primal energy that my Craft ancestors risked so much to worship in secret.  I can go downtown and see the building that was the church their coven would attend, so they could appear to be good Christians like their neighbors.  In a very Feri twist of fate, that building is no longer a church, but a Cabaret theater.  Walking up to the top of Lithia Park there are a series of pools in the creek that the locals refer to as "The Faery Pools."  You could cut the mana in the air there with a knife it is so thick.

It is beautiful living in our Mecca, but it is also a bit lonely.

By all accounts, that old coven disbanded before WW2, and Victor and Cora moved to California.  There have been other Feri folk who have lived here in the past, but as far as I know, I am the only one living here now.  I had grown so accustomed to having my coven brothers close at hand, I didn't realize how much their absence would pain me when I left.  For many years after moving here, it was so painful that I only practiced my tradition on a very superficial level.  I didn't go deep, I didn't really let the wild energy that is Feri course through me.  I couldn't; it was a reminder of what I lost.

Thankfully I have moved through that somewhat.  I remembered something very important that I had forgotten, that in a beautiful rite 5 years ago on this night I became one with the Goddess.  I can't be alone in my Craft, because I carry the Gods with me wherever I go.  That Feri isn't just about my loved ones far from me, but is really about the loved ones that are all around me.  

I don't hide from my power anymore.  I am even considering coming out of the broom closet at work.  Not overtly, not wearing it on my sleeve, but not feeling the need to hide anymore.  I stand strong and tall in the Crossroads.  I let the Will of the Gods come through me.  I let the Will of the God that *is* me continue to unfold.  I live, I breathe, I make kala, I LOVE.

I still miss my community, but I can connect to them in other ways.  I would love there to be other Feri folk here that I could do ritual with, and maybe there will some day.  I have taken on a student, although through a distance, and maybe other students who live close by will come.  Or maybe they won't.  It doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things. 

The only thing that matters is the I let nothing come between me and my God Soul as I swore to do 5 years ago. 

Even if that thing is me.

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